HOW I STARTED PRAYING REGULARLY – MY DEFINING MOMENT

I never prayed regularly in my teen age days or even in early 20s. Like most of the teenagers, I was irrational, irresponsible, idiot and my faith wasn’t very strong. My family is very religious Alhamdulillah, I was raised in a very spiritual environment, even most of my friends, my school, my teachers, my neighborhood, were all good practicing Muslims. But of course, all the young were careless, our parents would send us for prayers and we will end up playing cricket. Even in Ramadan, we would skip Taraweeh and just be wandering around.

My parents were very strict, and I am glad that they were. I can’t ignore the great positive outcomes of their upbringing as opposed to the little negative ones. Like every human being, my parents weren’t perfect either but I am so proud of what they have made me into.

Every day, I would leave the house for prayer but would never go the Masjid. I would be just passing time sitting somewhere and many times, my father caught me, scolded me, even beat me. For some days I would go the Masjid out of fear but then again back to normal. It was not like I opposed praying, it was just a stupid thought that I can’t be committed, I can’t continue it so better don’t do it all. One time I was on a vacation in Pakistan alone and was staying with my Nani (May Allah grant her the Highest place in Jannah), and my mother had told her that how I skip prayers. So one day, as usual I stepped out for prayer and just went somewhere else and when I came back, my Nani was standing at the main gate and caught me as I was coming from the different direction.

Before I come to the defining moment, what did you learn so far? Nowadays, we hear these arguments that don’t force people to follow obligations; it’s a personal choice, it’s better not to do something just out of fear. Well, I agree just to an extent that force shouldn’t be physical and it shouldn’t be all the time because if you keep repeating and repeating, people get annoyed. And the age factor is very important, you can scold, beat a teenager but once he is a full grown adult, you can’t force anymore but you can at least keep reminding him in a humble manner.

Create an environment around you where one should feel ashamed if he doesn’t follow but, be moderate, don’t try to humiliate if someone is not practicing well. Be a role model instead of a dictator. Like you see in my case, I was given an environment where everyone around me was practicing and it had a great impact on me, even when I was not following, I had this sense of wrongdoing, I knew I was doing wrong.

People nowadays claim that Religion is a personal matter and it should remain within your house boundaries and some even argue that it should be strictly just about you, don’t preach even your kids as they are free to choose. Well, yes they are free to choose once they are full grown adults but until then, it’s a parent’s duty to make him a practicing Muslim not just by force but by leading upfront, by being an idol and giving an environment, just like we do for the worldly affairs. Just like for exam preparations, our parents give us that environment, restrict us from many activities so that we can use our time properly to prepare ourselves. They monitor us, they monitor our surroundings so that we don’t get distract from studies, why don’t we do same for the religion?

Not following a rule, either Islamic or unislamic, it’s a choice and no doubt only Allah can punish or forgive but at least one should have this sense of wrongdoing. At least accept it. Even I don’t follow all the obligations truly but I always have this feeling in my heart that I have to be better someday because I am wrong, I could be punished and I ask Allah for forgiveness and I pray Him to make me a better Muslim. The biggest problem is that nowadays people don’t even consider a wrong thing to be wrong. You don’t have to listen to people all the time, read Quran, do your own research and then decide if you are wrong or not, and if you are wrong, try to change yourself at the least. If you don’t even have the feeling in your heart, may be even Allah won’t help you anymore and you will be all lost in the world which would seem like freedom but actually you are making yourself a prisoner for the eternal life.

So back to the topic, what was my defining moment for Namaz. It was my first day on my first proper job, it was a call center. In the morning shift, there was just one person along me and as it was my first day on the job, he was guiding me; he was explaining about the work and gave a short tour of the office. It was Zuhur time so he asked me, do you want to pray? Now, at this moment, I don’t pray, but I knew that how important praying is. I knew that a person who prays regularly is better than me. I am not saying that praying is the only thing that makes you a good person or a person who prays regularly is definitely better than the non-praying person, no, but you can’t deny its importance either. It’s an obligation. Namaz is the identity of your religion. Namaz is talking to Allah, asking for His forgiveness and Thanking Him for everything you have.

So as this person asks this question, I felt so ashamed to say no. Because we would be praying in the same office room; if it was going outside, maybe I would have continued the same thing which I was doing at home, slipping away. But because we had to pray in the same room, I imagined how embarrassed I would feel when I am the only one sitting while others praying.

So I said YES, I want to pray. So, we prayed Zuhur, and I prayed the remaining prayers of the day too in the office. One day later, it was my off day and as usual, at time of Zuhur, I left my house and as I am about to enter the same restaurant where most of the time I pass my prayer time, this thought hits me. I am thinking that yesterday I prayed at office because I was ashamed of what other’s will think about me, today I am alone, I am free, no one is around me, no one is looking at me so I am again not praying. And I realized that yesterday, I prayed not to please Allah but to please people. So I told myself, make a decision, if you don’t want to pray, then don’t pray at the office either and be shameless, and if you want to pray, then pray today too, pray for Allah, pray regardless of the situation, regardless of what people would say. So I decided, I will pray. And Alhamdulillah, my life changed. Prayer was the first step towards strengthening my faith and my bond with Allah. I am still very weak at faith, I don’t know if my prayers will be accepted or not because I don’t pray with 100% focus, but I try.

I will be thankful all my life to my colleague. If he hadn’t asked, probably I would have been the same guy. There is one more lesson, don’t stop preaching. Don’t over preach or be aggressive, but be gentle. My colleague didn’t instruct me, nor did he force me, he asked humbly and that sense of wrongdoing in me triggered and changed my life. And that man will be getting reward all his life just because of me praying, because of him.

All my colleagues were practicing Muslims but no one was aggressive. There is always a time and situation to preach. You can’t just preach anytime because you don’t know what other person is going through at the moment. Few months later, one person joined our call center and he was not practicing and he was the only one not praying amongst us. We tried, we talked to him, in a humble and gentle way, sometimes he listened and sometimes didn’t, so after trying for a while, we concluded that his time has not came yet and he is starting to get annoyed so we stopped. But we never humiliated him or considered ourselves better than him.

Be gentle, be humble and keep trying to bring your loved ones to the right path but always draw a line because if you cross a line, you may probably do more damage than good. Islam was not spread with force, our beloved Prophet (P.B.U.H) lead by an example. His kindness, his humbleness were the main factors. He created an environment which affected people’s heart. It is a slow process so both the listener and preacher should have patience. But remember, no one is perfect, people do mistakes and most of the time it’s unintentional. Try to look at the positive side always.